Good Enough: Overcoming the Need for Perfection

by | Aug 17, 2016 | Health and Wellness Coaching | 0 comments

-Imperfections are not inadequacies; they are reminders that we are all in this together.-

There was a period of time when I felt I was being called to change careers, but I was uncertain as to what that career would be and what it would look like. I began by paying attention to what areas of my current life made me feel most alive. What activities did I love to participate in? What skills did I have? How could I apply those skills to a new career? What did I value and which values trumped others? I focused on taking inventory of my wants, needs, and desires.

Once I narrowed down the answers to these I was able to research careers that aligned with what felt most authentically me.

I found that I love helping people and lean toward very humanistic centered activities. I have a heart for foster/adoptions and love to advocate for children finding forever families. I found that I still had some passion for my first career as a veterinary technician but that it had transitioned into more of an interest in holistic, integrative medicine for people and pets. I found that I enjoyed my weekends when I was either training myself or someone else for a marathon. I found that I’m passionate about female empowerment. I’m passionate about authentic, vulnerable living. I’m passionate about raising mindful children. I’m passionate about walking beside people as they journey this path with a teacher named Life. Meditation, blogging about real life issues, clean eating, backyard chickens, book clubs, body shame, distance running, nature, essential oils and plant medicine, personal development, therapy ranches, recovery programs, living out loud, traveling, orphanages… these were the things in my life that lit me up and made me feel unbridled passion.

I had narrowed down my career choices to pursuing a degree in social work, opening a therapy ranch (this is still my life dream), becoming a vet tech specialized in integrative medicine, freelance writer, personal trainer, or a life coach. Out of curiosity, I polled my family & FB friends and asked for feedback. What career did they envision for me if I were to make a new career choice? Over and over again they said, “become a therapist or life coach.”

I knew in the stillness of my being that I was being called forth to become a life coach. I knew others who knew me intimately or from afar felt I was already life coaching without pay and that it suited me well. And, yet, I still resisted.

Dealing with Doubt

Three years I dabbled with some of my career choices. I tried on the easiest ones first, the ones that I already felt I had some skill and experience with. The ones that had the least chance of failure.

Failure was terrifying. Doubt was a loud, living, breathing voice inside of me. I felt that I couldn’t become a life/wellness coach because I was not perfect. I am not perfect.

How could I coach people to clean eat when I hadn’t mastered that myself? How could I train people to meet big goals like marathons when I’m not that fast? How could I advise people to make career choices when I struggled so deeply with my own career decisions? Who was I to educate others on natural living when I still had so much room for improvement? How could I help parents develop mindful family systems when oftentimes our family systems broke down? Who would hire me as a middle-aged, mom of four boys with a soft middle and a no fancy letters after my name? Why do I deserve to make money for my services?

These thoughts plagued me, and so I chose to do nothing. I chose no path until I could no longer deny that becoming a Life Coach was the only choice I had – because it was the choice that felt most life-giving.

You. Are. Good. Enough.

The Advice that Would Change My Life

A dear friend (who happens to be a life coach) said to me, “Stop playing small and step into the power everyone else sees in you.” It was that talk that pushed me to action. I found that it doesn’t matter if I’m not perfect. In fact, the illusion of perfect can be off-putting.

It’s okay that my middle is squishy instead of a pure muscle. It’s okay that I’m not the fastest marathon runner. It’s okay that my kids are ugly from time to time. It’s okay that I will sometimes eat movie popcorn and wash it down with a draft beer even though I know it’s not the healthiest food choice. It’s okay. In fact, I prefer it.

My imperfection allows me to be a better coach. I understand the struggle of others. I don’t expect perfection from others. I am able to journey right beside my clients and meet them right where they are because sometimes I am there myself. I am them and they are me. I have found that becoming a Wellness Life Coach is all about imperfection. It amplifies the experience for myself and allows a safe, authentic place of sharing for my clients. I was good enough all along and so are you. The belief that I am good enough has given me the freedom to fly.

Have you thought about becoming a life coach but doubt your worth or ability? What life changes are you resisting because fear has sold you the nasty little lie that you are not good enough? What would your life look like if you stopped playing small and stepped in to the truth that you are perfectly imperfect? You. Are. Good. Enough. Now step into your power and never look back!

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